Feb. 7, 2010

On Feb. 7 Mike had the opportunity to preach at one of the churches in a nearby village. It was definitely an experience! He had done this a couple times before, but I had never been to a village church before! While many people here speak English, there are still some who only speak Lugandan. He preached through an interpreter! You can see through the photo that the church is a little "rustic" compared to what we are used to! Last time he preached at this church there were no walls, just open air! This time they had put up some "walls" though because they said it distracted the people when they could see everything that was happening outside of the church! As you can guess it was very different from the way we "do church" in the States. The worship was all in Luganda and much more lively than most churches in America. Since we really did not know what they were saying, it was difficult to join in worship, but we did our best and Uncle Paul (the pastor of the church who grew up at New Hope) tried to tell us what they were saying so we had some sort of idea what was going on! It was definitely an experience we will never forget! We have couple of videos that I took during the service which we will glady share when we get home! Just thought you might want to see this picture! There are others posted on my (Rachel) FaceBook if you are interested in looking!

Recommened Reading

If you are interested in reading up a little bit on the Doctrine of Adoption, there is a wonderful book out written by Mark Stibbe entitled From Orphans to Heirs: Celebrating our Spiritual Adoption. We have been reading through this book as a class assignment, but totally recommend it for anyone! It is very eye-opening and powerful!

The Orphan Heart

Last week we spent much of the week going over the Orphan Heart and Doctrine of Adoption. It is impossible in a form like this to convey all that we have learned and that God is still teaching us, but for this post I would like to just give a glimpse of the things we are learning. My goal is to give you the characteristics of an Orphan Heart. We all know that there are physical orphans (Bibilically this means someone who is fatherless). We see many fatherless in our midst every single day. What we do not always want to recognize is that all of us who are without Christ are spiritual orphans. Even further, we do not want to recognize that we all have the heart of an orphan in one way or another. As you go through this list, ask God to reveal to you the areas of your heart that have these tendencies and to help you work through them.

1. Abandonment-because they have been left by one or both parents they have cold emotions; do not know how to respond to love.
2. Rejection- feels rejected or betrayed; thinks "no one love me" or "you don't really love me" (they may even use these as manipulative tools)
3. Loneliness- feels alone bound by fear of being abandoned again; cautious with past experiences; interprething things (words and actions of others) through past experiences; feels isolated even in large groups.
4. Hopelessness- no sense of future hope/destiny; "life can never get any better"; no purpose or direction
5. Worthlessness- feels ashamed that they are a mistake; a person without standing.
6. Sadness- heart is not light and happy/heave burden of loss; pain is buried deep- can't be happy even in a happy environment
7. Mistrust- really do not trust anyone; believe that at anytime they may be abandoned or rejected; cannot reveal painful things
8. Hiding- hides & builds wall around their heart; conceals rather than reveals heart issues; very common to lie about obvious things
9. Superficiality- does not relate at a deeper level; relationship is based on what he/she can get; *** be careful not to encourage this-there is really no way to help someone without a genuine relationship
10. Insecurity- result of pain; fear that anything may cause pain
11. Hypersensitivity- very sensitive to words, actions, and signals; a simple word can be a big deal because they interpret to understand based on past and what they want rather than what you mean; careless words can bring more pain
12. Self-pity- take offense very easily
13. Fear- of man, rejection, separation, disapproval; of man in sense of gender and authority figures; becomes a big deal when you try to correct or instruct because they fear not being approved of; only wants to hear what he wants to hear not what is good for him
14. Poverty Mentality- he doesn't have enough even in the midst of plenty; keeps needing more; hold on to what he receives-wont give it away; survival mindset; fails to enjoy what he has or to be thankful
15. Greed- seeks to fill the hole in the soul; will fill with destructive things (sex, drugs, etc) that give temportal comfort
16. Manipulation- controls others to get as much from them as possible; tool to protect against pain
17. Anger- resentment; anger at self and others
18. Selective Memory- tries to block out painful memories; denies reality
19. Fantasy- deals with facts but not truth; "if parents were here life would be better"
20. Misinterpretation- makes own interpretation of what one says based on past experience
21. Independance- spirit of rebellion that says "I will do thing my way"
22. Striving- driven by need to succeed or be somebody; what you do makes you loved (earning love and acceptance)
23. Restless- don't stay home; go from one place to another to sleep/stay
24. Confused- don't know how to respond to love

There are probably countless other characteristics, but these are the main ones. Which ones describe YOU?

Grief and Glory

One of our dear friends here in the Kasana community had a very trying week. His wife had several cists removed, was in the hospital for many days and several of their five children went down with malaria. On top of that he is a pastor and teacher. I was given the opportunity to preach in his church last Sunday morning. The week leading up to this was a trying one for both Rachel and me as well.
Last Monday, Feb. 1, marked the two year anniversary of my dad's death. A missionary couple was going out of town the weekend leading to the anniversary of my dad's death and asked us if we wanted to stay in their home. Beginning sometime in early January I dreamed of my father just about every night. I thought that I was finished processing and greiving but soon discovered that I am not. It is a hard thing to suffer loss and pain. Many things happen when one loses someone so close to them. You feel abandoned, fear, anger, confused, etc. For me I had buried some of these pains deep within so I wouldn't have to deal with them. But God in His grace and mercy has gently begun to heal these wounds.
That Monday afternoon was spectacular for me and Rachel. I felt a huge weight laying on my heart and I knew that I could no longer hold back the tears. I started telling her how I kept going over the events of my dad's death in my mind and finally went over word by word the events of that day. I broke open into tears and cried on her shoulder. It's probably been 2 years since I cried like that, evven then I don't think I let anyone see me crying. After a few minutes I felt much better and recalled what God testified to me that morning, 'Mike, you are not really fatherless. You are my adopted son. You can call and cry to me as Abba, Daddy.' I knew that in my head for many years. In fact I wrote an exegetical study on the Doctrine of Adoption but it was not till that morning that this reality hit me.
Rachel greatly ministered to me throughout the day. She made me a delicious dinner, chicken stir-fry, with honey and soy sauce and made brownies with chocolate chips and cashews for dessert! The best food I have had in months. She also wrote me a card and read several key Scriptures to me which was medicine to my soul. God so glorified Himself in the midst of my pain, I gained unsurpassing joy.